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avatar One_Confusion6969 6 mon.ago

Yo mama so fat the sniper didn't need a scope

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Where does a General keep his armies?

In his sleeve-ies

2. After playing the guitar for years, I thought I could learn to play the piano.

It's not an easy instrument to pick up.

3. My late grandfather was the undisputed king of keeping gnats and flies away from our food at family reunion picnics. Now that he’s gone, that role falls to me this year. And while I’m ready to take it on, everyone keeps reminding me…

…I’ve got some big shoos to fill.

4. The biggest tragedy in Star Wars is the lack of information on one of their greatest unsung heroes. He brought the Rebels the plans for the second Death Star before he died.

But that is all we know about Manny Bothans.

5. Two goldfish are in a tank.

One turns to the other and says, "you know how to drive this thing?"

6. I bought a pair of shoes

I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don’t know what they were laced with, but I kept tripping.

7. The sheep was trying to break up with her controlling border collie boyfriend.

When he denied it, she responded "you herd me"

8. A married couple woke up one morning.

While still lying in bed, the wife turned to her husband, and said, "Maybe you shouldn't go to work today." "What do you mean? Why shouldn't I go to work today?" replied the confused husband. "I think you've been working too hard, so maybe instead of going to the office, you should take a few days off, pack a suitcase, and go stay with a friend for a few days away from home." The husband thought for a moment and decided to jump at the suggestion before it was forgotten. Within moments, he was up, dressed, and started packing clothes into a bag. "Just out of curiosity," the husband asked while getting ready, "how did you come to the conclusion that I've been working so hard that I need a break?" "You were dreaming about your work all night," the wife answered. "Really? How do you know I was having dreams about work?" he asked. "Because every 2 minutes you were shouting your secretary's name!"

9. I was standing at an airport bar in an international departures when this small Japanese guy comes in, stands next to me, and starts drinking a beer. I asked him, "Do you know any of those martial arts things, like Karate or Ju-Jitsu?"

He says "No and **why the fuck** would you ask me that? Is it because I am Japanese?" "No", I said, "It's because you're drinking my beer, you little fucker."

10. Brain surgery is the hardest because:

The organ is encased in bone.

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